Ammi just had to say it and my dad always came to Ammi’s rescue. If the light bulbs needed changing, or there was a leak in the kitchen pipes, electric appliances needed fixing or the telephone line was disruptive, I never saw any plumber or electrician coming home. Ammi just had to tell her superhero – my dad ! Yes and he would fix it. From taking care of the cars, fixing engines to washing them Baba was always there. I have accompanied baba several times when he would take a bucket of water, old rags and a brush to clean Ammi’s car and his own. He has helped her in times when Ammi would be busy checking our homework or making us study in the evenings and baba would efficiently cook a meal. Ammi and Baba had that kind of rapport inter-dependent loving and always there for each other.
Ammi had a Woman’s Day Out once a month when together with a few community ladies ( 45-50) they would gather in someone’s house on a weekend night and the hostess would cook rice and make drinks while the others would bring potluck dishes. This was scheduled for 5-6 ladies getting food so that there is neither overlap nor wastage. They would play games, read out minutes of previous meetings, have some speeches given. It was very much organized like a toastmaster’s event. Ammi loved to read and baba loved to write. He wrote witty, humorous and fun-filled speeches. Ammi read some of these ( called mazmoons) and they all had a hearty laugh. Many other ladies were gifted and showed their talents the same way. But Ammi’s superhero was always there for her.
2010, Baba suffered a partial stroke. He got better with physiotherapy but then had a heart attack, a stent put in and then knee falls, another heart attack, brain haemorrhage and slowly he gave up on life. But Ammi did not. She was beside him always taking him for his sessions of physiotherapy, appointments, follow-ups and what not. It was a trying time for her. Baba slowly stopped walking and though it was difficult for her she made sure he will walk for 10-15 minutes at least thrice each day. He did exercises for muscular and leg movements all due to the efforts put in by Ammi. She was his pillar of strength and stayed so till she breathed her last. During her last days, she would repeatedly say : “I am tired”. We did not realise how tired she really was. My brothers Abbas and Faraaz helped by doing baba’s odd jobs a lot, particularly Faraaz whom Ammi was fond of and stayed with. But Ammi was getting weak, many a times shouting at Baba to do things on his own but he had given up on life a long time back. Me and my brothers did not see how it was taking a toll on Ammi’s health, on her life and heart. She hid her pain from us . But I cannot judge or question God’s will. Ammi used to tell Baba ;” I will go away before you” ……..and she did. She left peacefully without a word to me, Abbas, Faraaz or baba.
The lovebirds have separated. Baba feels her absence but he has sworn to silence and wont say much. At times he looks at her picture and asks: ” Where is Rizwana?” If I ask him who is she, he will say ” My wife”…He remembers and forgets. Sometimes we dont know if it is good for him or not. Old age is like that – objectionable….painful….. We do not want to see our loved ones suffer in that age and we definitely do not want them to go away !!!
